On The Lighter Side

Visiting his grandparents, a small boy opened the big family Bible.

He was fascinated as he looked through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out. He picked it up and found that it was an old leaf that had been pressed flat between the pages.

“Mama, look what I have found,” he called out.

“What have you got there, dear?” his mother asked.

With astonishment in his voice, the boy answered, “I think that it’s Adam’s underwear!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A preacher was completing a temperance sermon.

With great expression he said, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river!”

The congregation nodded their approval.

With even greater emphasis he added, “And if I had all the wine in the world I’d take it and throw it into the river, too!”

The people clapped and were saying “Amen”.

And then finally, he concluded, “And I had all the whisky in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river!”

As he sat down, the song leader then stood up quite slowly and announced, “For our closing song, let us sing Hymn Number 555: “Shall We Gather at the River.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Father O’Malley answers the phone.

“Hello, is this Father O’Malley?”

“It is”.

“This is the Tax Office. Can you help us?”

“I can”.

“Do you know a Ted Houlihan?”

“I do”.

“Is he a member of your congregation?”

“He is”.

“Did he donate £10,000 to your church?”

“He will!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Courtesy of the Christian Centre Newsletter, Ebbw Vale)

In love, laughter, joy and peace

Many blessings

Geoffrey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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